For White People Only

For years we've fought for racial and gender equality in our society, and around the world. From slavery, to voting rights, to segregation - we've fought against prejudice and bigotry in our efforts to achieve a color-blind, inclusive society. The road has been long and has had many obstacles, but we've kept on it and arrived at our destination - or so we thought.

Exclusive White clubs that catered to men were supposed to be a thing of the past. They aren't. Our valiant brothers to the North has shown us this backwards, non-progressive way of life still exists. Luckily they had the courage to confront this issue and didn't turn a blind eye to it. They took a stand against this horrible practice.

Our ethnically diverse Canadian (13% are non-European decent! Really! They're not all French either - contrary to logic, Europe has yet to kick France out - they could do it too...a little dynamite along their border and a few thousand tugboats to tow them to Iran should work. We're talking about real racial differences in Canada, like Asians and Africans, I think they even have one Samoan up there, it's enough to give you goosebumps and make you relive the adventures of nineteenth century safaris and expeditions to the Dark Continent.) friends up North, sprung into action by voting to deny any Shinearama fund-raiser money go to a non-inclusive "charity" that only helps White people.

OTTAWA - The Carleton University Students' Association has voted to drop a cystic fibrosis charity as the beneficiary of its annual Shinearama fundraiser, supporting a motion that argued the disease is not "inclusive" enough.

Cystic fibrosis "has been recently revealed to only affect white people, and primarily men" said the motion read Monday night to student councillors, who voted almost unanimously in favour of it. The decision caused heated reaction and left at least one member of council calling for a new vote."

Cystic Fibrosis racists have finally been confronted and shown how awful they really are for not including Blacks, Asians or other races into their club.

Once Canadian students go after those bigoted Sickle Cell Anemia sufferers and the charities that enable them, we will finally have a chance to live in a world that doesn't judge us on the color of our skin, but instead on the inclusiveness of our genetic diseases...just like Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. envisioned.

Read more at the Anticrat.

Filter Happier

One of the scarier aspects of our benevolent overlords, the Democrats, is their aversion to speech that challenges them on their ideals and practices. Now, with a Democratic lead Congress and a Democratic president elect, our ability to even question them is in danger.

Despite their rhetoric in 2006 about not bringing back the Fairness Doctrine, the Democratic leadership has, since then, said on many occasions that they'd like to see the Fairness Doctrine reenacted. Now they're even more vocal and hungry for some kind of curtail on Conservative speech.

They want to expand the Fairness Doctrine to include speech on the internet along with radio broadcasts. Added to this is the FCC's plan to make the internet free for everyone. This means the government will have direct control over ISPs since most won't be able to compete with other companies that provide free service and will have to join the program to receive their monthly stipend. That stipend will come with catches, as do all government checks.

Once the ISPs are controlled properly the government can enact programs like this without the unsavory practice of debating it in public. Filtering out unwanted content like hate speech and pedophile tips may be tolerable to most, but will they still tolerate a filter that targets their political dissent, religious speech or their non-PC mannerisms? Ten years ago I'd say never, today I can't be that sure.

The following might be a good plan for the enforced, approved behavior that will surely come once speech is fully regulated. A happy worker is a productive worker, and a productive worker doesn't cause trouble by deviating from the preset parameters. Be productive...for the good of the state:

Filter Happier
by Radiohead

More productive
Comfortable
Not drinking too much
Regular exercise at the gym (3 days a week)
Getting on better with your associate employee contemporaries
At ease
Eating well (no more microwave dinners and saturated fats)
A patient better driver
A safer car (baby smiling in back seat)
Sleeping well (no bad dreams)
No paranoia
Careful to all animals (never washing spiders down the plughole)
Keep in contact with old friends (enjoy a drink now and then)
Will frequently check credit at (moral) bank (hole in wall)
Favors for favors
Fond but not in love
Charity standing orders
On sundays ring road supermarket
(No killing moths or putting boiling water on the ants)
Car wash (also on sundays)
No longer afraid of the dark
Or midday shadows
Nothing so ridiculously teenage and desperate
Nothing so childish
At a better pace
Slower and more calculated
No chance of escape
Now self-employed
Concerned (but powerless)
An empowered and informed member of society (pragmatism not idealism)
Will not cry in public
Less chance of illness
Tires that grip in the wet (shot of baby strapped in back seat)
A good memory
Still cries at a good film
Still kisses with saliva
No longer empty and frantic
Like a cat
Tied to a stick
That's driven into
Frozen winter shit (the ability to laugh at weakness)
Calm
Fitter, healthier and more productive
A pig
In a cage
On antibiotics

Virtual Immortality

I'm sure everyone is familiar with the feeling of time dragging on forever when you're doing something really boring or unpleasant. This often occurs when you're getting a root canal, waiting at the DMV or picking up the new Britney Spears album because your niece has to have that for Christmas. This effect has been constant for me lately and it's getting stronger.

Today it's twice as bad as yesterday. It's not a mystery why this effect is happening, but its growing intensity was. That is until I realized it stemmed from this gem: Obama Spokesman Says 'Obama Ready to RULE on Day 1'.

Her saying that wasn't a slip of the tongue, it may have been an accident, but the sentiment was true. The aristocrats with their golden calf god finally have (almost) total power in the US. They won't be benevolent, despite their propaganda claiming they're for the people, no, they will be typical despots and dictators. They're already planning on crushing any dissent in Congress and planning on crushing any dissent through free speech. They'll soon crush parts of the Constitution, the first, second, thirteenth and, most likely, the twenty-second amendment. Crushing everyday people won't be off limits, heck it won't even be a challenge for them. The media wing of the Democratic party will make any such events look justified.

Since last Tuesday it's felt like months have crept by, slow painful massive chunks of time. Today it's much worse, who knows what tomorrow will bring. Obama hasn't even been inaugurated yet, only six days have passed since he won the election. This makes me long for a root canal instead - at least a root canal is over within two days. Today it feels like a year has passed since last Tuesday and I have four more actual years minimum of this to look forward to.

His reign will feel virtually like forever, I'll be immortal. Time to buy a sword and start practicing, there can be only one after all.

McF-ing-Hell

My level of disgust coupled with my frequent trips to the restroom to vomit are keeping me from saying much else at this time. It's events like this that makes me rethink my pro-life position.

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Planning under way for Obama holiday

Plans are being made to promote a national holiday for Barack Obama, who will become the nation's 44th president when he takes the oath of office Jan. 20.

"Yes We Can" planning rallies will be at 7 a.m. and 7 p.m. every Tuesday at the downtown McDonald's restaurant, 1100 Kansas Ave., until Jan. 13. The goals are to secure a national holiday in Obama's honor, to organize celebrations around his inauguration and to celebrate the 200th birthday of President Abraham Lincoln, who was born on Feb. 12 1809.

At 7:30 a.m. on Inauguration Day, Obama Cake will be served at the downtown McDonald's, and a celebration is scheduled for 8 p.m. to midnight Jan. 20 at the Ramada Hotel and Convention Center, 420 S.E. 6th.

For more information, contact Sonny Scroggins, (785) 232-3761, 845-6148 or at biasbustersofkansas@yahoo.com; Lamont Lassiter, McDonald's general manager, 608-2739; Ava Chander-Beard, (785) 234-9138, ava.beard@sbcglobal.net; or Rhoda Carr, (785) 220-5883.

The Good Old Days

Imagine way back when, waaaaay waaaay back, when humans lived in tribes and small villages...

Imagine how they dealt with guy who broke tribal law, raped the chiefs daughter or failed to belch with enough gusto to make the cook proud. Perhaps he got off easy with a severe beating...or a mild stoning. He was lucky, they liked him, but what about the ones who really screwed up?

What of the liars? The guys who told bald-faced lies promising their neighbors protection and friendship while plotting to steal and betray them. I'm sure that behavior would quickly destroy a tribe if not dealt with quickly - perhaps by cutting out his tongue, lopping his hand off or banishing him from society.

Would they be gentle to the guy who stole from all of them only to give it to party dude guy? You know, the guy who huffs dino-pooh, or smacks his head repeatedly with rocks just because the colors are so wow man. The guy who wakes up at the crack of noon so he can get am early start on his mead chugging. I'm sure you've seen his descendants hanging around the paper shop and the pastures where the cows are asking for it.

Or how about the guy who opens the gate so the enemy can raid the village? The one who happily turned a blind eye to the 50 people slaughtered due to his betrayal since his payoff of glass beads and a very willing and soft sheep more than makes up for their deaths.

My imagination isn't that great, yet I'm certain a large roughly hewn log and their rectum were involved though, and that just to warm them up before the rest of the tribe had a chance at them. Who knows what they'd do to someone who did both crimes, especially if he was trusted to lead them all.

You didn't have to worry about being elected out of office back then. Your constituents were thousands of deadly perils you had to deftly deal with daily. You worried about making it through the day alive. The last thing you did was show outright contempt for your fellow tribesmen.

Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi should have been born a few thousand years ago.